I was in a grocery store the first time I truly stopped to acknowledge the depths of my feelings as we live through COVID-19. Surrounded by my fellow customers in homemade face masks and staring at the store’s empty shelves, I noticed tightness in my chest and shallow breathing. My mind was racing with the worry that I would not be able to provide for my family’s needs. As so many of us are experiencing right now, this thought provoked both anxiety and fear.
This experience was a wake-up call to myself for something I had been denying ─ the true psychological impact of our current situation on society and on us as individuals. It was not until I exhibited physical symptoms (racing heart and thoughts) of my own feelings that I could fully realize – and start to mitigate – the fear and anxiety that comes with uncertainty.
It’s time to acknowledge the real impact of what is happening in our world in this moment. Most of us have experienced personal challenges or supported loved ones through their own difficulties. Our friends and family in the healthcare professions are confronting situations they never imagined. Our lives have changed rapidly in the matter of weeks and we are facing more uncertainty than ever before.
All of these feelings – and the physical ways they present themselves ─ are normal. The most important thing we can do is to accept our fear, explore it, understand it, and work through it. Here are some techniques to practice as you confront your own anxieties.
- Commit to a daily practice. As our situation and the facts we are presented with evolve daily, we will likely need to check in with ourselves every day. New anxieties or fears may arise, but being mindful of our changing emotions allows us to further explore them.
- Be kind to yourself. When we name and accept our anxiety and fear, we can explore them with curiosity and compassion. We are able to face them and understand them in the moment without negatively judging ourselves. Understanding the emotions takes away their power.
- Check your facts. When I left the grocery store, I was able to identify the thought of not being able to provide for my family as just a thought, not a fact. I was able to get everything my family “needed” at the store, and I had the financial means to do so. Once I “checked the facts” and could “talk back” to that thought, my related anxiety eased.
- Then check your breathing. Use mindful breathing skills to activate the vagus nerve, letting your brain and body know that you are safe. I have used this process daily, in addition to a number of other mindfulness skills, since the first week of sheltering in place. If you would like to learn a few of my favorite mindfulness skills, check out Knowing Yoga’s “Calming Through the Breath and Senses” on YouTube.
All of our lives have changed significantly in the past month. Let’s talk about it out loud with each other. Let’s acknowledge how we feel and allow ourselves to be vulnerable. This is how we will heal and grow.
We will continue to share different mindfulness, self-care, and coping skills with you on the MJCW blog. Make sure to click the subscribe button at the top of the page to receive email alerts when a new entry is posted.
I wish all of you moments of stillness, quiet and calm.
Andrea Cunningham, M.S., LPC-S, CYT